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Sunday, November 7, 2010

Outsourced - A New NBC Drama

Instead of going to India to dance with fisherman, Obama should have been taking in something most Americans are much more familiar with, outsourcing. We have all heard the horror stories of outsourcing, which is the politically juiced term for a reduction in competitive advantage. (Hint: Unions kill competitiveness, ask Michael Moore or anyone living on the three moons presently orbiting him) But this isn’t about unions, that is a battle for another day, which may be tomorrow if I get a good night’s sleep. What this is about is the principle behind outsourcing. Outsourcing as we know it is when our jobs get sent overseas because someone in another country is thankful to be hired rather than their American counterpart who is pissed they don’t get Susan B. Anthony Day off. (Boom roasted unions) Now, your feelings about this practice might not be so acrimonious, but remember when your mom would go to one grocery store over another because dunkaroos were a nickel off, same underlying principle, saving money. The other part of outsourcing, Barack pay attention and stop doodling, is that it allows you to tap into the resources of another group of people without necessarily hiring them. Say you have a bustling Hang in There Kitty Poster company and you want to start a call in center to sell them, you can outsource that to a company with expertise in that area. It makes all kinds of sense to do this. Save money, get the best guy for the job, don’t look like a butt nugget when you try and do it yourself and the board figures it out. Ok, enough of my protracted analogy. You may have guessed it, Obama is the one selling these posters but he is also the asshat who is getting called out hard by the board, the American public. Now, me and my compatriot here have a friend in the marines,  and assuming everything in Starship Troopers was right, he knows a shitload about going to war. Me, I know literally nothing, except you don’t need heavy horse to defeat the 17th century British.  If I was making a decision about fight, I’d give him a call. Or turn around in my chair because there’s a 32% chance he’s sneaking up behind me with a k-bar and I have no idea. My point is this, when I know nothing about something, and Wikipedia is just of no help, I go ask someone. This is what we’re not seeing out of this administration. As much as I’m sure your water coloring degree from Columbia and a JD from Harvard prepared you for the intricies of global finance, maybe, just maybe, there is a dude out there who knows more than you. Perhaps even two dudes. Probably not three, but that’s only because he is so cerebral. Instead of making decisions about our 13 trillion dollar economy based on your time as a community organizer, start outsourcing these decisions. I will not disagree with his assessment that our country is in a bad way. So let’s go JFK on this situation, get a room full of guys running on caffeine and chain smoking, and listen to whatever they say. The debt commission is not the answer because they are just what their title entails, a group concerned over our debt. What we need is a room full of the smartest people coming up with ideas and Obama listening to them. This administration needs to learn the smartest people surround themselves with even smarter people. This would involve sucking it up, admitting you don’t know everything, and listening to someone else. One can only (audacity of) hope this happens but it doesn’t look promising, given Obama’s track record of having to make every decision his. (see also, sending 30k troops when 40k were requested) If not, at least he’ll be able to break it down with all those fisherman out of work in the Gulf when he gets back from vacation. Sorry, I mean back from official business.

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